Sunday, December 14, 2008

Damn you Joe...

So my super terrific friend Joe took my advice and bravely began writing his own blog Dorkus Maximus a few days ago. Even though I urged him to write about himself, his hopes, his dreams, his inner thought type stuff I have yet to write about mine. So in an effort not to be a hypocrit I will make a concerted effort to write a little about those subjects myself.

So... My hopes and dreams... suprisingly scary to write about! Let's start with my originals. When I was a little girl I wanted nothing more than to be a supermodel rockstar who drove a fire engine red corvette with fire painted down the sides. I changed my name to Veronica Michelle, and could sing all of Whitney Houston's "Greatest Love of All" at a meer 5 years old. I remember sitting in the back seat of my Mom's car belting my heart out to no one, just hoping that the car next to us was a famous producer who would happen to hear me and make me an instant star. I was convinced that was how it happened for all my favorites like Michael Jackson, Tiffany, Debbie Gibson, Whitney Houston and NKOTB. I had no idea becoming a star meant working your keister off.

As a teenager I was still holding onto the dream of being a singer, but the supermodel part was let go as I realized I wasn't the supermodel type. Throughout highschool I did some acting and singing which I was good at, but nothing came too much of it. When I was about 14 I auditioned for Star Search, but for whatever reason my Mom couldn't come with me. Being so nervous without her I cried through the entire audition, and of course did not make it.

By my early twenties my dreams had changed and I wanted to be married and have children. I was lucky to have met the man God knew I needed and together we made our dreams of parenthood come true. Through that I learned that some dreams are definitely worth working for and seeing through, and I still live that dream everyday.

Now, twenty-nine years old, married, and somewhat disabled my dreams are different. The dreams I have now may seem to some people insignificant. But to me these dreams are real and I think about them everyday. Today I dream to be stronger. Not just physically but mentally and emotionally as well. I dream of having a daughter. I dream of being a teacher and changing people's lives through expression of all mediums of art. I dream of knowing my worth, and feeling like I have a gift to offer the world, which is something people have often told me, but that I have yet to realize. Mostly I dream of being the best me for my children, my Husband, my God and myself so that I can be truly happy, and so that I can help people and offer them whatever they need. I've honestly found as I've gotten older that my most important dreams are the simplest ones. These days being famous or having a corvette is the last thing on my mind, while just being the best me for everyone in my life is what I dream about every moment.

So to my friend Joe, and anyone else in the wide world who might read this, I hope you can be brave and write down your hopes and dreams so that you may have more time to ponder them in hopes that you can make them come true.

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